Image
image
image
image

Read Dr. Newberger's Approach
for Helping Couples Resolve Conflict


A Common Therapeutic Approach to Marriage Counseling

You may be shocked to learn that in a survey of marital therapists, over 60 percent said they were neutral whether a couple stays married or gets divorced. Only one-third agreed with the statement, "I am committed to preserving marriage and avoiding divorce whenever possible." This philosophy has huge implications. Take the case of Stephanie and Max. They were seeking help to heal their strained relationship.  Stephanie revealed, “We were looking for someone to work with us on a specific plan for our marriage.  Instead, we got a totally neutral counselor who didn't seem to care whether or not our marriage survived.  We weren't neutral about wanting to save our marriage, he was."

Clinical psychologist and author, Willard F. Harley, Jr., observed, "People who seek help from marriage counselors usually assume that the goal of therapy is saving the marriage.  Unfortunately, most marital therapists are specifically trained to be non-directive or neutral.  They see themselves as someone couples can talk to, but not someone who will coach them into changes that will ultimately save their marriage."  Yet the evidence suggests that if marriage counseling does not incorporate the goal of relationship improvement, the likelihood of a divorce increases substantially.

Lesson to be Learned:  Those seeking third-party help to resolve marital conflict should learn the approach this individual has and the role he or she intends to play before committing to his or her process.  Is he or she willing to fight for the preservation of your marriage?  Is he or she willing to help the two of you engage in dialogue and activities that will cause your relationship to thrive?  If there is no explicit goal of rebuilding the relationship at the beginning of the process, disappointment will more likely be experienced at the end.  Such was the case for Stephanie and Max.  They ended up getting divorced.

Dr. Newberger's Peacemaking Approach:
Resolution and Reconciliation

Dr. Newberger is a goal-oriented, conflict resolution practitioner.  He holds a Ph.D. in Conflict Analysis and Resolution and is the architect of the “Reconciliation Model of Peacemaking.”  Dr. Newberger's expertise is in promoting harmonious interpersonal relationships.  After analyzing your situation as a couple, he will work with you to develop a path forward to a happier, less conflicted, and more secure marriage.  Click here to view the outline of his step-by-step process.

image
image

image